FollowForbearing One Another in Love
© C. O. Bishop THCF 1/12/14 (revised 2024)
Ephesians 4:1-3
Introduction:
The vast majority of the writings in the Church Epistles address the Local Church. They are about, the Local Church…not the Universal Church. Why? Because the Church Universal only includes believers. And, the majority of them are already with the Lord. They do not need correction, as they no longer even have their old sin-natures. They are truly perfect in their inherited, imputed righteousness.
The Problems in the Local Churches
The Local Church, in contrast,(hopefully) includes mostlybelievers; but, in the first place, it is entirely possible (and common) for an unbeliever to “infiltrate” the ranks of the local assembly, and, in the second place, the believers themselves (yes, every one of them) still have their sin natures, and they still regularly fall prey to the evil one.
And there lies the root of all the problems in all the churches throughout history: We are Sinners, saved by Grace. God sees us entirely in our new natures, so He does not condemn us for our sins. But we do sin, and we offend one another, as well as the unbelievers around us.
The Result of Those Problems
Romans 2:24 states that the unbelievers “blaspheme the Name of God” because of the actions of the People of God. In that particular instance, it specifically referred to Gentiles whom the Jews offended. But the same truth holds solid during the Church Age. the Local Church often offends both Jewish unbelievers and non-Jewish unbelievers As a result of our sin, they speak evil of the God of Eternity. I have seen bumper-stickers saying, “God Save Me From Your Children!” That is pretty tragic.
Jesus said, “By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples: if ye have love, one for another.” (John 13:35) Everyone is supposed to be able to recognize the Agapé Love in us: not just our besetting sins.
How Should We Respond to Our New Position In Christ?
Paul spent three full chapters explaining the new position of the believers: We are in Christ. He also began stating the reasonable expectation of God for us, as new believers—that we are to step into the good works that God has planned for us, and “walk in them.” We are to grow in our understanding of the Holiness of God, and the Magnificence of His inheritance, etc. But now he also says to completely change the way we get along with one another.
Paul had already received severe beatings for the sake of the Gospel. He had been imprisoned at various times, and he (evidently) knew that his ultimate end was to die as a martyr. But he did not “pull rank” and tell the younger believers, “Hey, suck it up, and get with the program! If I can do it, you can do it!” Rather than that, he is pleading with the believers, asking them to grow up and get along with one another, as befits the people of God.
He is telling them, “You have an incredibly high standing with God! You ARE the children of God! Live as though that is what you are! Handle your interpersonal relationships in the same way that He would do it.”
(And how would He handle it? What would that look like?)
“Walk Worthy of the Vocation Wherewith Ye are Called”
Do any of you still say, “I don’t feel called”? Well, God says He has called you. He says that your calling is “high and holy,” but that the result should NEVER be a “high-and-mighty” attitude!
Quite the opposite! The sure knowledge that our position is completely because of Jesus, His supreme sacrifice at the Cross, and His perfect resurrection three days later, should produce in us a sense of unworthiness and humility. Our position in Him has absolutely nothing to do with our own personal righteousness: It is entirely His righteousness. We now are in a position in which we never can “look down our nose” at another person. It should never produce any self-righteous arrogance: It should always result in humility and gentleness.
Godly Wisdom and Character
In James 3:13-18; we can see several important points that apply to this concept:
- Godly Wisdom should produce good behavior, and, specifically, gentleness; meekness, as the KJV puts it. It means “yieldedness to God”, to be precise.
- If it does not produce that behavior, then the wisdom is not from God!
- Wisdom that is from God is:
- Peaceable—peace-loving—a peacemaker, by nature
- Gentle
- Easily approachable—easy to be entreated
- Full of Mercy and good fruit
- Impartial
- Genuine—not hypocritical
- The seed whose fruit is Righteousness is sown in Peace by those who make Peace.
The apostolic records of Paul and James are in complete agreement. the Christian life ishould not include Pride and self-will. If the character of the person who claims to be wise does not fit the above description, then the “wisdom” they are offering is not from God. It is “human wisdom.” Satan himself has bent and twisted it.
Remember that Satan held himself up as being powerful and wise: He desired “preeminence.” (Isaiah 14:12-15) When a human takes that same proud stance, guess where it is from? (Here’s a hint…it isn’t coming from the Holy Spirit.)
“With Longsuffering, Forbearing One Another in Love”
“Longsuffering” has frequently been translated as “patience.” But the idea of “patience” in our modern language could mean something as inconsequential as “not being in a hurry.” The meaning here is literally “enduring”. The word translated as “suffer” means to endure. It means accepting the reality that life is not always easy. It means embracing that reality, not fighting against it. Compare 1st Corinthians 13:4; “Charity (the Agape Love) suffers long and is kind…” It not only endures, but it does not become bitter in the process. It does not keep a record of wrongs suffered—there is no grudge-holding, here.
So: Paul says that we are to endure one another’s idiosyncrasies. We are to endure life together. All of us truly are “in this together.”
Philippians 3:10 says we are to be learning the fellowship of His suffering, That is what “fellowship” means—it means we “have something in common.” We do this together. Ultimately, when we endure a hard circumstance that occurs specifically because of our relationship with Him (that is, not just the ordinary vicissitudes of life), then we are suffering with Jesus. We are joining in the “fellowship of His sufferings.” We are partners with Him! And thereby we also learn the Power of His Resurrection, and we are transformed into His likeness.
Agapé is the Governing Principle
Paul concludes that we are to forbear one another in Love. We sometimes use the word “forbear” to mean “hold off”—don’t do whatever it is you are planning. (An orchestra conductor might say, “We would like to ask the audience to forbear applauding until the recital is completely over.”) But Paul is using the word differently: it means to “put up with” one another. And not the kind of “putting up with” that involves exasperated sighs, eye-rolling, and a stormy countenance. Notice that he specifically says, “Forbearing one another in Love.” The Agapé love is to be the governing principle in all of the Christian life. We endure one another’s idiosyncrasies, and we Love one another in the process.
The Agape Love is selfless—when we read the description in 1st Corinthians 13, we quickly see that there is not one word in that passage about “how we feel” toward one another. It is all about actions. It means choosing to do what blesses the other person, without regard to how it affects us. Agapé Love is always an act of the will. You either choose to love by the power of the Holy Spirit, or you choose to try to do things in the flesh. (Do you want a hot tip? “The Agape Love is not possible in the Flesh!” You should understand that, as a primary truth of the Christian life.)
Every command of God is ultimately impossible by Human effort. Jesus said so! (John 15:5 “…apart from Me ye can do nothing.”) The Christian Life…all of it…is not difficult: it is impossible if you try to do it in the flesh.
The Bottom Line
Notice the last line, here: Paul says that we are to endeavor to keep the unity of the Spirit, in the Bond of Peace. God knows that no single party can maintain Peace…both parties have to agree. But this gives us the means by which to approach one another, or by which to approach both parties involved in a church squabble.
Paul, by the Holy Spirit, has begged us to stop the bickering, and maintain (not create) the Unity of the Spirit. We are not told to produce that unity. We are only told to work at keeping that unity…maintaining it.
The next passage defines that Unity. We will deal with that next week. But what we can take away from this passage is that the Love of God is to be spread across ALL Christian relationships, as the “oil” that reduces friction, and as the “perfume” that adds the blessed fragrance of Christ to the local Church.
Becoming the Fragrance of Christ
In 2nd Corinthians 2:14-16, God calls us to be the “Fragrance of Christ” in this fallen World. To those who despise the Person of Christ, that fragrance will smell of death. To those willing to receive Him, it will smell like eternal life.
May The Lord use His Word to transform each of our lives into that reality. If our local assembly exudes the fragrance of Christ, one of two responses will occur. People will stay away, because they can’t stand Jesus, or they will be drawn to His Grace, as it flows from the church.
Lord Jesus, please change our thinking toward one another, and teach us to love unconditionally, reaching out to bless one another, to heal one another’s wounded hearts, and to pour the water of life into one another’s thirsty spirits. Pour Your Grace through us all, in Jesus’s Name.